Thursday, February 3, 2011

Change Your Life...Now!

Welcome to a new editorial series called: Change Your Life…Now!

This editorial series is written to help, inspire, guide and motivate everyone from all walks of life to face their challenges, identify barriers, discover miracles and find their true happiness while continuing their quest for emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being. Author & Clairvoyant, Therese Benedict, invites you to share your personal stories, provide insight from past or present experiences and most importantly engage with those who are struggling with everyday life situations. Topics range from: loneliness, heartache, depression, lack of hope, longing for love, battling addictions, abuse, domestic violence and/or other life-challenging situations that can take away from one’s happiness and well-being.

Get ready for a spiritually uplifting and inspirational journey as Author & Clairvoyant, Therese Benedict, helps you and others heal from your past and love who you are while showing you the steps to take to finding true happiness.

Query & Answer Forum:

“There are a few caveats in play for me. I’ve recently moved back to the east coast (from California) to live with my boyfriend and blend our families. Our relationship has fizzled out very quickly and it feels like were just roommates with kids. We’re close but not intimate. I feel like I’m just here to replace his wife and the issues were having are the same that he says ended his marriage. I’m 42 with 2 children 4 and 17. I’ve never been married.

I am working on mustering up the energy to find a job. I lost my business - I’ve been self-employed for 10+ years. Again, living on the east coast is unfamiliar and I don’t have any contacts. I’m out of my comfort zone: struggle with feeling unemployable, then yesterday my bank accounts were just frozen and emptied because of a debt I’ve been unable to pay. I have so many desires and I gave them all up for what I believed to be stability and love when what I really feel is imprisoned and unable to stand on my own two feet.  For years I’ve depended on other people to support me and my children. I believe my fear of success and the state of lack that I always seem to be in stems from childhood beliefs, I mean, of course it does. I’ve been working on them for years and still hit these walls that knock me off course. I feel very alone in my spiritual beliefs. I don’t have anyone to talk to or work with to really deal with and overcome this lesson. I know there will always be more. It is my will and intention to live a higher life yet I’m at this wall and can’t stop crying. My addiction - struggle - it feels horribly normal.”

- Pamela L., Paramus, NJ



Regarding your relationship, your feelings are on track. You are seeing truth at its finest. Blending families in a relationship takes time and an adjustment period. However, when you are no longer being intimate you need to be honest with yourself that something is wrong. When you have the closeness but not the expression of intimacy you cannot turn your head and acknowledge that there are feelings not being said. You need to understand that when you are dealing with the same problems that ended his marriage – these issues lie within him. When you are noticing the changes you are seeing, you have to really be strong and think to yourself…is this road going to where he once was (to an end of a relationship)? By not facing the facts that you are living, will only keep you at misery with tears.

You need to become strong and take the steps that are in your soul, so you may leave your imprisonment and to show you that you are capable of standing on your own two feet. Let your children be your strength, let your happiness motivate you and bring back your desire so you may find your way to peace.

If you do not go back to California, then make this unfamiliar place…familiar. You need to have faith in yourself that you can make these changes that you desire. If you have struggles with that, then show yourself and your children that you can make those steps that take courage. Do not let your financial situation pin you down and control your life. Know that you can overcome this.

Never give up your desires, if you do not want others to support you any longer than just know that time can change something you do not want to something you always wanted. Do not let fear take control of you and hold you back from success. Know that you have the power to change those childhood beliefs into something beautiful. This journey will be hard for you, but know that it will be a journey of knowledge, wisdom and growth for you and your children. When you hit those walls that take you off course, stand up and walk back to the directions you wish to go.

Regarding your spiritual beliefs, you are never alone. Heaven is always with you, even if you cannot see your angels or loved ones with the naked eye. Talk to them more and ask them for help. Ask a little at a time, so you may see their answers. Believe me; they do hear you and they are here to help. So take their hand and let them lead the way. Watch for the event that comes up and look for the message of where you need to go with your life for you and your family.

When some feel that misery is normal, they need to go in another direction in life so they may heal and have happiness with love.

You can conquer this!



  1. Hello Therese,
    Thank you for your response.

    Lately my biological father has been very present in my conscious thoughts. I haven't seen him since I was a little girl and he passed 10 years ago. Everyone called him Rick, his given name is Walter. Is there something he wants me to know?

    Is California where I belong?


  2. Pamela,

    Yes, there is something he wants you to know.

    He wants you to know that you can change your unhappiness to happiness and that you need to move on with your life elsewhere, so you may be happy. He wants you to know that he loves you and it will take a little time for you to get situated, but in time it will be a success on changing your life. That you need to trust in him knowing that you will be going in the right direction and not to let fear stop you. It is important that you do not just jump and go…that you need to take your steps slowly in making this move. Set yourself up first, and then make your move. He wants you to be happy and he wants you to believe in yourself, for you have many reasons to…that you will see the reasons more when you grow and show yourself you can accomplish this hard task.


  3. To respect the privacy and nature of personal content, the following has been edited from a conversation that Therese & Pamela had off-line.



    Thank you for your response!!! I could feel that in my heart!!! I have thanked my father and sent him my love.

    I have only recently realized that my fear of success stems from my fear of loss - a fear that like all things I've loved in my life it will be taken away. I know it's crazy intellectually yet I believe that has been my subconscious belief, and one I've been working on releasing. I just don't know what new beliefs to fill in the gap.

    When my mom took my brothers and I away from our dad we went to live with my grandmother and my grandfather, she was the one who raised me until she passed when I was 10. My grandfather passed a month later. Losing my grandmother felt like losing my mother. My mom was lost and just didn't know how to communicate with us. I was devastated and grew up very angry and hurt many people (of course including myself). My Uncle (my mom's only sibling - passed about 15 yrs ago) stole my grandparent’s estate and robbed us - he was so special to me when I was a little girl... I have recently connected with his son. I love him but we seem to be keeping each other at arms length. He has told me how fond his dad was of me.

    My grandmother has been dead for most of my life but the woman has such a hold on my heart. She was the kind of woman that everyone loved and admired. I don't believe she felt that for herself. I feel so much grief in my heart when I think of her all of these years later as if so many opportunities were taken away from me. She gave me so much in the time we had together.

    With love,

    Hi Pamela!

    I am so happy that you could feel it in your heart and that you have thanked your father and sent him your love.

    For you to realize where your fears comes from is a very important step to beat the fear. Just know that with you bettering your life will only show you that you do not have to be so afraid of fear. That fear is an emotion that stems from hardship and emotional experience and – by making better experiences in your life can dim the fear that has a hold on you. The belief to fill the gap is the belief in you, the belief in your angels and the belief in God and with that belief you need to add trust. Have faith in you that those fears and experiences can change with a beautiful outcome and not a heart wrenching one. You need to also remember that all success does not end in loss; success can also have the outcome of total happiness with strength and knowledge of what you are capable of doing.

    Even though you have lost many people that you have loved and that have been there for you, does not mean that they are gone. So speak to them and know that they are standing there just as they have before to listen to your words. Speak and then watch through seconds, minutes or days that they have heard you and are supporting you as they did before but with greater power. I must say that you need to dig deep inside of you to even make you better and again you will see your life get better in ways that you have not even thought of and how much heaven can help. Heaven can do anything, so work with them and try to put your worries aside even though they will not be completely on the sidelines.

    You will be amazed how heaven works!